Caitlin is a student and a volunteer for the Violence against Women project at Amina. She recently created a documentary on the topic of forced marriage.
Forced Marriage Victim: "I had no where to go, no-one on my side. I felt trapped."
Forced marriage is an issue I was aware of, but had heard very little about. I had never really thought about it as I don't associate it with my community or people I know.
It was only after making a documentary (see below) about the issue that my eyes were really opened to just how big a problem it is and how close to home it can happen!
I'm a media student and, this year, I was set the task of making a documentary on a topic of my choice. My group decided on forced marriage after my Muslim friend suggested it, saying that it often goes unreported and isn't talked about enough. We then set out to shed light on the issue, focusing mostly within the Muslim community in central Scotland.
When we started filming the video I found out a lot more about the issue that I hadn't known or understood before, like the difference between "forced marriage" and "arranged marriage". Two terms that seem to be used interchangably in the media, but are in fact very distinct. An arranged marriage is a common practise where a marriage is decided by the families, but the final choice remains entirely with the couple to be married. Forced marriage, on the other hand is where one or both people do not agree to the marriage, and they are often tricked or pressured into it. No-one should ever be emotionally or physically forced into marrying someone they do not want to.
It was eye opening hearing stories of people who were victims of forced marriage.
"I could tell by the way they spoke they were going to force me in on it." - One of the survivors explains to us how her family acted around her as they tried to force her into marriage.
It was hard hearing what these young people had gone through, and how their experience would now affect their life. I couldn't quite believe what I was hearing, they spoke about being tricked and feeling trapped or being made to feel guilty and shameful. It was at this point that I realised this happens to real people, who I might even know, and I found that very shocking and hard to come to terms with. Luckily, these people were able to seek help.
Forced Marriage is a real issue and there needs to be a real effort to tackle this problem, like Mridul Wadhwa (Shakti Womens Aid) said in our documentary, "...we have to recognise that it is all our problem!"
Over the course of the filming there was one message that kept coming up again and again: You Can Change This. I really felt that in making the documentary I was doing a small part to Change This. Talking about the issue actively helps everyone involved and unites us to speak out and tackle the issue. Amina's You Can Change This campaign is raising awareness about the issue of forced marriage; we need to break the silence and we need everyone to help us spread this message.
"It's not fruitful, it's against our faith and it doesn't produce positive results." - Shaykh Amer Jamil, on forced marriage.
If you are worried that this might be happening to you or someone you know, support is available.
Remember that this is not your fault and you are not alone. Don't be afraid to speak out.
Remember that this is not your fault and you are not alone. Don't be afraid to speak out.
Please leave any comments below - would be great to get your feedback about our documentary!
Speak soon,
Caitlin
